In an unguarded moment of vulnerability, tennis star Andrey Rublev has given voice to his personal struggles with depression, revealing that he felt utterly adrift and questioning the very purpose of existence. Just a year ago, the 27-year-old Russian player’s outburst at a line umpire during a match in Dubai sent shockwaves through the tennis community, leading many to speculate there was more beneath the surface of his volatile behaviour.
Subsequent to this incident, Rublev publicly acknowledged his bout with severe depression. This marked a significant departure from his usual stoic demeanor. In his quest to navigate the murky waters of mental health, he sought help from a professional and was prescribed anti-depressants.
Rublev, currently ranked ninth in the world, shared his feelings with journalist Reem Abulleil of The National. “It might sound dramatic, but I was questioning the purpose of life. I felt completely out of sync with myself,” he confessed. According to Rublev, the feeling wasn’t transient; it wasn’t something that ebbed away after a few months.
Instead, he found himself trapped in a cycle of despair for years, until he reached a point where he felt he couldn’t bear it any longer. “When you’re caught in this loop for years, not knowing the way forward or understanding the rationale for anything, it’s like you’ve hit a brick wall,” Rublev narrated.
However, anti-depressants didn’t prove to be the panacea Rublev had hoped for. His breakthrough came in the form of a conversation with fellow Russian and tennis legend Marat Safin. Safin’s advice and guidance resonated deeply with Rublev, offering him much-needed support.
Despite the ongoing struggle with his mental health, Rublev, a champion of 17 ATP titles, maintains that he has gained a sense of equanimity. He doesn’t feel overwhelming joy, but neither does he experience crippling negative emotions. “Right now, I’m in a neutral state. I wouldn’t say I’m happy, but I’m not feeling terrible either. It feels like I’ve found a foundation, a starting point,” Rublev mused.
On the professional front, Rublev is set to face Quentin Halys in his opening match in Dubai this week. His journey underscores the importance of addressing mental health issues head-on, an issue that has been gaining traction in the world of professional sports.
